Just Me & My Fear Of Heights

Yesterday afternoon I went with a couple co-workers to hang twinkle lights in the trees outside the theatre we perform in. Our New Works Festival is coming up in a week or so (eek) and twinkle lights are kind of a tradition. Anyway, hanging lights in the trees required ladders.

I kind of have a ladder phobia. These were relatively small ladders, and I was going up only a couple steps, so it was okay. But in general, I do not like ladders.

Ladders can fall over. Ladders could slip on the ground and slide out from under you. Ladders can be placed unsteadily on grass and tip you off.

Being a stage manager, I’ve been in contact with a lot of ladders. Usually I don’t have to be the one climbing them though – luckily that is normally someone else’s job – like the lighting people. God bless you, lighting people, and your CRAZY LONG ladders that you balance on unsteady rails in the air, and then scale like you have no fear. God bless you also with your scaffolding that you build as you climb it (I’m looking at you, Marin), and your genies. Ugh.

In New York I worked on a show where, to get to the booth, I had to climb a ladder affixed to the wall. I spent the entire 4-week run convinced I was going to slip one day and fall and die. Then someone told me that it wasn’t that high, and I probably wouldn’t die, which alleviated some of my stress. But I’m still grateful that I will never, ever have to set foot in that theatre again – it was one of the three worst spaces I’ve ever worked in.

I don’t mind being up in the air – as long as I’m on something sturdy, permanent, and preferably not see-through. I would definitely like to try out that glass walkway thing that goes out over the Grand Canyon, but I’m pretty sure it would scare the bejeezus out of me. But you know, in a fun way.

Maybe this fear came from my family’s infamous tree house story – my dad is probably rolling his eyes at the fact that I am bringing this up – but when my brother and I were kids, we were building this AWESOME tree house out in our back-backyard. For a little while, it was just a platform in the tree, and Robb and I used to climb up the ladder (see? no fear then) and spy on the neighbors while they lounged in their random hot tub. One day, as my dad, Robb and I were up there working on adding walls or something, the whole thing collapsed and dumped us out of the tree. We were all totally fine, and although we talked about rebuilding it, we never actually got around to it.

Possibly that’s when I started being wary of heights and ladders and genies and other things like that.

Anyway, I made it through yesterday afternoon: 
working with the scary, scary 6′-ladder and the towering, monstrous pretty purple trees, and the muy peligroso twinkle lights. I stayed off the ladder as much as possible and just climbed around on the benches under the trees. No biggie.

And hopefully now the courtyard will be gorgeous and lure in many, many ticket buyers. I guess it’s all in a day’s work.

If you feel like commenting, tell me the ridiculous thing you’re afraid of! Backstory speculation is welcome, but not necessary.