Category: Memoir

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Setting a routine

We’ve been in our new place for a week now. I can now say comfortably that I do not think we made the worst mistake ever moving out of our apartment. (That was a very real fear a couple times there.)

We’ve now had time to settle in, figure out what stuff goes where, and get used to sleeping in a new bed. We’ve each decided which shower we prefer. We’ve cooked meals in the kitchen. This morning I hosted our book club here and we made lunch for our four-person book club. (It was awesome.) (We should entertain more.)

We lived in the other place for over 2 years. I had a routine down. I knew exactly what I did every morning, and while it was a lot of back and forth from the living room to the bedroom to the bathroom to the bedroom, I knew what each step was and there was a very precise reason I did everything in that order.

But I have to kind of start over here. None of my stuff is in the order it used to be in, for one thing. For another, the bathroom where I shower is not the bathroom where I keep the hair dryer and everything. So there’s a lot more back and forth, because after 4 work days I still haven’t quite figured out what my exact routine is. There’s still a lot of, “What am I missing here?” It takes me a little longer to get out the door in the morning. Which is fine, since my commute is about cut in half.

Drew’s commute is about doubled, which makes our commutes about the same length of time now. Which is nice.

The good thing about getting a chance to recreate your routine, is that it allows you to build in some good stuff. I am trying to build the following things into my routine:

  • Healthier eating, specifically snacking – we’ve purchased a lot of fruit in the last week, and I’m also depending a lot on those frozen vegetables that you steam right in the microwave
  • Cooking dinner – in the last few weeks at the old place, we basically gave up cooking anything besides chicken nuggets on a baking sheet
  • Going to the gym on the way home from work – theoretically I can avoid the worst of rush hour if I wait it out in a spin class
  • More walks – it’s so pretty here, and there are lots of places to explore before hitting the library on the way home.

I also want to try to be more of an adult in 2012: meaning, I want to fold my clothes as soon as they’re clean* and make the bed every day and wash dishes as soon as they’re dirty. Honestly, I have less hope for these resolutions than for the others.

It’s fun to remake yourself every January 1st. And I feel like this year we get an extra boost to help facilitate that!

*I’m rolling my eyes as I write this, since I know that every single clothing item I own is freshly laundered but stuffed into a laundry bag on the floor somewhere. I guess I know what I’m doing tonight.

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Being a girl Drew Endings Memoir Sentiment Writing

2011 My Year In Status

Facebook does this thing I enjoy, where you can sort through all your status updates from the year and then it puts them into a pretty jpeg for you. The writing is a little small (that’s the first time I’ve ever said that!) but I still like the concept of seeing my entire year like this.

There are things I entirely forgot about – and lots of things that I totally thought happened over a year ago. This year was definitely not boring – but also not too eventful.

Unfortunately I couldn’t fit all of the statuses I wanted to. So here are a couple that I had to leave off, that I still enjoyed rereading and reminiscing:

  • First attempt at homemade lattes: aborted!
  • Just found out this play is called Seagull. Not The Seagull. Good to know. First preview tonight!
  • You know she’s your BFF when she texts you how much she loves you…in drunk Spanglish.
  • To the old woman sorting through the trash dumpster at 8am: I know you were most likely just looking for recyclables, or even treasures that some wasteful entitled person threw away…but you are the reason I’ve gotten all OCD about shredding all my personal documents.
  • Today is No Apologies Monday! Did you make a faux pas today? Don’t say you’re sorry! I was 10 minutes late to work…but I’m not sorry!
  • Things trending on Yahoo right now: HIV, M Night Shyamalan, and Julia Louis-Dreyfus. #NoApologiesMonday
  • A word problem: If Safeway has a “Buy one, get two free” promotion…can two adults eat 3 lbs of strawberries before they go bad?
  • If USPS is going to “deliver” things by tossing them onto the balcony 3 days earlier than the expected delivery date, it’d be nice to get a heads up so I don’t leave the package out there in the rain all weekend.
  • I definitely thought the royal wedding was tomorrow. Who gets married on a Friday?? Was Westminster Abbey booked for another royal wedding tomorrow or something?
  • Jonathan Amores: a fervent enthusiast of good theater plays
  • Drew: Are we an item? Me: Yeah. Right? Drew: Eh, I don’t really believe in labels.
  • I ate so many jelly beans today. : (
  • From Tina Fey’s “Bossypants” – “In the “Great American Melting Pot,”…New York is that chunk of garlic that you bite into thinking it’s potato and you can’t get the taste out of your mouth all day. It all blends once you mix it, but sometimes you really have to grind it against the side.” I miss you, NYC!
  • I would really like to go up in a hot air balloon.
  • Finally used a Starbucks treat receipt! First time ever!
  • Drew: “We have a very important decision to make and I think we should both say what we think at the exact same time. Should we get a Christmas tree this year? We both say what we think on three. Ready…one…two…three–” Drew and me: “YES.” Drew: “–because it’s Christmas. Okay, good. So we’ll do that.”
  • I drove for 3 minutes in the carpool lane, before 9am when it’s open to all. Rebel!

I promise that’s the last of the 2011 retrospectives!

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Endings Home improvements Memoir Nature Sentiment

Ready to be moved already

Every morning this week, when I’ve gotten up and come out to the living room, my first thought is always, “We’ve been robbed!”

I mean, I guess yeah, I would say I’m easily amused.

Although…maybe I’m just going a little crazy here and finding amusement where I can.

Also, having taken out almost all of the furniture, and everything off the walls, we’ve found that our apartment is delightfully resonant. Last night I was going on some little rant about something or other, and I realized in the middle of it that I could hear my voice reverberating in the living room. That had to drive someone crazy. Someone besides Drew, I mean.

It also means I don’t want to yell anything from the bedroom to the kitchen, like I normally would, unless I’m okay with all our neighbors hearing it. And, given that one of my priorities in life is to never be someone that other people eavesdrop on disdainfully, it makes for a lot quieter evenings.

Here are three things I’ll miss: the three cats that live around us. First, there’s Black & White Cat who mostly sits in the grass down the hill from our front door.

Then, there’s Backseat Driver Cat. I can’t remember the full story about him. But I’m pretty sure if you’re not looking, he’ll jump in your car while the door’s open, and then make annoying commentary from the back, like, “Why are you getting on the freeway here?” and “Oh…I would have gone to the other McDonalds.”*

Finally, there’s Ghost Cat. Ghost Cat is primarily seen at night in the fog, and is a swift runner. I took a picture of Ghost Cat but when I developed it, there wasn’t anything there and the inside of my camera was all melted. (Wait, that’s basilisks, not ghosts.)

I have no idea who owns any of these cats (well, I mean, Ghost Cat obviously has no owner). But I’ll miss seeing their tails disappear as they run into the bushes to hide. And I’ll miss Backseat Driver Cat telling me to turn on my headlights, even in the middle of the day.

*Sadly I have no picture of Backseat Driver Cat at this point, because once I made the decision to write a roll call of the Cats around here, he stopped showing up. I believe he’s self-conscious about his orange fur.

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Awesome Beginnings Being a girl Dreams Drew Endings Family Memoir Nonfiction Self improvement Sentiment Writing

2011 New Year’s Resolutions: Finis

Now is the time to look back on 2011 and see which of my New Year’s resolutions I accomplished. I’m happy to report that this year went pretty well!

1. Get off of unemployment

In June of 2010 I finished up a contract job at Marin Theatre Company, and I spent the remainder of the year patching together work from MTC, the San Francisco Opera, and reading for Samuel French, as well as supplementing with unemployment. While it wasn’t the tightest things have ever been around here, it was frustrating to be constantly thinking about trying to get enough hours among all the jobs. My number one priority as the year turned from 2010 to 2011 was to get off of unemployment. Which I did, basically right away, when I started subbing in January.

2. Get a career type job

Subbing was very interesting and I learned something, I’m sure. But it was obviously not for me. And like I said before, I was tired of cobbling together a living. My number two priority was to get a freaking real job, with stability and health benefits. Which I did in February! So far, 2011 resolutions are going great!

3. Lose 30 pounds

Oops.

4. Pay off at least one credit card

Oops again. Well, that was a tall order and I might have guessed that it wouldn’t happen.

5. Help Megan to have the best wedding ever

Done and done. I might add, I also helped Liz have the best wedding ever. A good year for weddings!

6. Change everything to my new(ish) last name.

The things I hadn’t yet changed over to my new last name (from my 2009 wedding) were my Mastercard, my gym membership, and three store credit cards. As of this morning I had changed my Mastercard and my gym membership. I planned on just moving this resolution to my “2012 resolutions” list, but then I had this big burst of inspiration, and so I spent some time on the phone this morning calling around and changing the rest of it. 2011 ftw!

I want to mention that every customer service representative I talked to said, “Congratulations on your recent wedding!” when I told them why I needed to change my name. I was too embarrassed to say, “Thanks, it was over 2 years ago.” How time flies.

7. Remember birthday cards for important family members this year

Well, unfortunately I had a couple lapses this year, and for that I am sincerely sorry. I have changed my system because having them in my planner is not working out as well as it used to – I’m just not in the planner often enough. I put the birthdays that keep slipping past me into my gmail calendar so that I’ll get a reminder 2 weeks out, so I can actually get something in the mail in time. 2012 will my card-sending, offending-no-one year.

8. Get a passport!

Thanks to Drew and the scavenger hunt he arranged for my birthday, I am now the proud owner of a passport. And I used it to fly to New York in October, so I know it works.

9. Write!

This was broken down into 5 categories to make it more quantifiable:

  • Script Frenzy in April
  • Submit to Samuel French Off-off-Bway Festival in July
  • Nanowrimo in November (I made the conscious decision to stay sane this November)
  • Blog 100 times over 2011 (the actual number is 168 public posts, counting this one)
  • Look into a Record-Bee column (I actually submitted about four of these)

I’m feeling pretty good about this year! So it’s time to start making me some 2012 resolutions. While I ponder over those and try to make them as specific and achievable as possible…let me know what your biggest resolution is!

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Thanksgiving

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The Family That Does Roadside Maintenance Together…

I left work about 20 minutes early today. I had reached a natural stopping point in my workload, and I thought, What a lovely, productive Monday it’s been. Drew was waiting at home with sandwiches for dinner, and Erin was to be coming over later for some Game of Thrones. Wonderful.

As I drove home, I called my mom. I didn’t call her back yesterday, and I wanted to catch up and discuss coming home for a visit. While on the phone with her, I mentioned I was in the car and that it had been shaking just lately, and what did she think that was? She suggested something to do with bearings. I agreed.

I continued my drive home, which, for once, was relatively low-traffic. I was pretty happy. Mellow conversation with mom, and, like I said, the promise of sandwiches.

Suddenly, a large low sound from the rear left side of the car, and then insane thunking noises. I said, “Mom? I have to go. Um…I have to call you back,” and hung up while moving swiftly through three lanes of traffic and pulling off on the very soft shoulder.

A tire blowout! That explains a) the shaking, and possibly b) the random noise that Jonathan and I heard last Friday while we were driving around doing work errands. We checked all four tires and couldn’t see anything out of the ordinary, so we finally decided that something had fallen out of the sky (or from an overpass) and that was the noise.

But now it appeared that it was a tire problem even then. And I really didn’t drive the car at all since Friday afternoon, which I guess is lucky.

Drew came and changed the tire – but when we got in our cars to leave, he found that his battery was dead! I backed up my car level with his to give him a jump.

As I backed up, I ran over a sprinkler pipe sticking out of the ground, and it made the most godawful scraping sound. I pulled forward again – cue second scraping sound. Jeez louise.

We hooked up the jumper cables and did our best to get his engine to start, but no dice. He called his dad – who knows everything about cars – to ask for advice, but there was really nothing he could tell us over the phone. So then we both sat in my car and waited for his dad to show up.

“On my 280 commute, there’s always at least one car pulled over with its hazards on,” I said. “And every time I see that car, I’m thankful it’s not me. But I guess sometimes you have to take one for the team.”

“Yeah,” Drew said, “but if this is the worst thing that happens to us, then that’s pretty good.”

Luckily, I was very close to home when my tire blew.

When Drew’s dad showed up, he somehow managed to find the sprinkler head in the dirt behind my car, even though it was pitch black out there and practically in the bushes. “Just leave it,” I said, and he laughed at me.

He hooked up Drew’s battery to a magic portable battery and got the car started in seconds. Then we packed away everything and all three pulled onto the freeway to head for home.

On the way, we passed a car on the side of the road, with its hazards on. A minute later I got a frantic call asking, “That wasn’t you, was it??” But I was practically home, safe on my sturdy little spare tire.

So I guess tomorrow I’m making a pre-work Firestone run. And I guess I’m forking over the money for a new tire. And I feel grateful that the shaking mystery is solved. And that all three of us got off the pitch black side of the freeway safely.

What I learned: The best thing to do in an emergency is remain calm. I should probably just change my own tire, rather than making someone come all the way out and drain his battery to do it for me. And stuff probably doesn’t fall out of the sky to cause weird noises with your car.

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Awesome Memoir Religion Self improvement Sentiment Theatre Writing

How to Write a New Book for the Bible

Yesterday, Drew and I went to see How to Write a New Book for the Bible, by Bill Cain, at Berkeley Rep. I worked with Bill on two shows at Marin Theatre Company – Equivocation and 9 Circles. (Kent Nicholson, who directed How to Write a New Book…, also directed 9 Circles. Kent and Bill are great together – I think that this play wouldn’t have been as good under another director’s hand.) 

Bill was a very active part of both of MTC’s rehearsal processes, and consequently we spent a lot of time together. He is a very sweet and very quirky guy, and was always willing to talk to me about whatever – writing, theatre, etc – and after one conversation about self-editing, he showed me a draft copy of How to Write a New Book…, and the ridiculous amounts of notes he scribbles on every single page. I really liked working with him.

I don’t know what I was expecting from How to Write a New Book…, really – I knew the show was about the death of his mother and that it was highly autobiographical. Bill is a Jesuit priest, and religion is always a main character in his shows.

I’ve never seen a show at Berkeley Rep before. First of all, I loved the theatre – it was their thrust stage, which is a really interesting space. At about 5 minutes til curtain, the house manager (?) came in and announced the whole space, “Feel free to scoot inwards for a better seat,” and then Drew and I watched a bunch more people come in, and we decided that that announcement was the worst idea ever.

As for the show itself…it was about the death of his mother, and it was highly autobiographical. It created a lot of feelings in me. Feelings about writing, about religion, about family, about theatre, about God, about life, about being in rehearsal with Bill and hearing pieces of these anecdotes. I sort of loved the use of the small set, and the staging. The actors (2 playing themselves through the whole thing, and 2 playing multiple characters) were stellar.

There was a Bible passage that was repeated several times throughout the play – I’m not sure of the speaker or the location. But I believe it’s Peter or Paul, and it’s along the lines that “All things come together for the greater good.” (Uncle Pastor, help with this? Book of Acts, maybe?) In the play, Bill (the character – but also sort of the writer) repudiates this. I personally tend to think that all things do work together and work out – but I know that Bill would argue with me on that, and have lots of good examples and probably Bible verses to back it up. So I probably wouldn’t start that argument.

How to Write a New Book for the Bible is only playing through Nov 20th. I fully recommend it to anyone who can go in the next week.

We’ve seen a lot of theatre over the last 6 weeks. I probably walked out of this one with the most residual feelings at the end. Highest commendation?

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Megan’s Bachelorette!

Megan wanted to go into New York City for her bachelorette party. So 2 days before the wedding, 9 girls piled into a limo and prepared to take the Big Apple.

2 Ms of Honor, 5 bridesmaids, 1 friend, and 1 bride!

It was about a two hour drive into the city, with one stop for orange juice (to mix with the champagne we’d brought) and another bathroom/snack stop (the first of many of the day).

The limo dropped us at Astor Place, where everyone grabbed some pizza to get us through until dinnertime. Then we walked down to our East Village nail salon, called Blush – a place I would highly recommend (I really need to write them a Yelp review).

I love this picture!

I originally wanted a French manicure, but ended up just getting a regular one with a super pearly pale white color. I really liked it – and the whole thing was worth it for the cuticle cleaning up and the hangnail clipping. Man, I love that.

A success!

After our salon time, we walked back to Astor Place to catch an N train to Times Square. A couple of the girls had never seen New York City, so we checked out Times Square, including the M&M store and the Hershey store.

Then we walked over a block to Megan’s favorite New York restaurant, La Masseria.

After that we wandered through Times Square, and down to 42nd Street. We went into Dave & Busters to find a bathroom, then we heard from the limo driver that he was trying to get back into the city but was stuck in traffic. So we decided to walk back up to Toys ‘R’ Us to ride on the ferris wheel. But we all got separated, so 6 of them went on the ferris wheel and 3 of us ended up watching.

Then, Megan realized she was missing her phone, so her cousin Emily called it about 20 times until someone answered. Turned out it was back at Dave & Busters. Then the limo driver called and was going to meet us at 42nd and Broadway. So I grabbed Megan and said, Let’s run back to Dave & Busters, the two of us can go really quickly. So we dashed back and got her phone, then back to the limo.

He drove us downtown past the Freedom Tower (I’m still not totally sure why) and then back to Connecticut. We got back to Mindi’s house and drank and talked and ate Cheez-its and played with her kitten. Then around 1:30 we divvied up the sleeping places (I got the couch!) and passed out.

The next morning it was back to the hotel via Dunkin Donuts breakfast, and then lots more to do before the rehearsal dinner Friday night!

A muy successful bachelorette party: a great salon, a great dinner, NYC fun, and Megan even got her lost phone back!

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To Megan and Dennis and Their Nuptials

Think of this as the toast I meant to write for Megan’s wedding, but then I double-checked the division of labor between me (the matron) and the maid of honor, and saw that she was meant to give a speech about Megan, and I was meant to give a speech about marriage.

I debated just writing a speech about whatever I wanted – after all, what bride even remembers anything from her own wedding? – but Drew was adament that I shouldn’t talk about myself AT ALL. No one wanted to listen to me ramble on about in-jokes and cliche platitudes.

So I listened to him, because he’s always right (right?), and I’m very happy with the way my 45-second toast ended up.

But think of this as the toast I would have written, if I didn’t have someone around to direct me straight (and tell me I wasn’t allowed to talk for 10 minutes).

Hi, I’m Syche, Megan’s matron of honor, and I want to talk about Facebook.

Megan and I were college roommates in our freshman year at UC Davis. This was actually before Facebook. We did have AIM though. I have a million great memories from the dorms: Riding our bikes to the Great Wall of China with our 2 guy friends for every single birthday or “special” dinner (we always got the same family meal). Hanging out with just the Christmas lights on. Trying to make cookies in the sparse dorm kitchen. A road trip to San Francisco. Megan’s taping up vocab words all over the walls (this was back when she was still an English major, before she abandoned me for a real career). The Merry Wives of Windsor. Biking to Baskin-Robbins to buy ice cream cakes for people’s birthdays. Megan’s weird butterfly chair, and the blanket with the stars all over it. How annoying it must have been for her when I insisted on completely changing the layout of my half of the room for every quarter.

We accomplished a lot without Facebook to distract us.

We sort of drifted apart for the next three years, and would only run into each other sometimes on campus and say hi. Then we graduated and I moved to New York and she started law school, and we really lost touch. At some point, we became Facebook friends though. And this is where it gets really romantic.

In late fall/early winter of 2008, I was moonlighting as a “room monitor” at an NYC theatre company near Union Square. “Room monitoring” basically meant unlocking the room, turning on the lights, and then reading or messing around on the internet while whatever outside group used the awesome rehearsal space, then turning off the lights and locking the room. I’m pretty sure one time, I actually took a nap. (Shh)

It was during one such shift that I was Facebook stalking Megan, and saw that she had written this huge FB note called “Musings of a Christian “No on 8″ Voter.” It was (is) super long, and I read the entire thing. She talked about people calling themselves Christians but doing un-Christian things, and how difficult it was for her that the people who raised her and with whom she had already aligned herself – were on the other side of the “Prop 8” debate. And she talked about how it was breaking her heart.

I couldn’t believe the things she was saying – they were so much like the things I thought, and so different from what I would have expected from my old roomie. I emailed her immediately telling her that I agreed, and talking some more about some different interpretations of those good old Bible passages.

She didn’t get back to me right away, but a few weeks later she emailed me a massive email (I have since gotten used to Megan’s massive emails!). From then on it was a downhill slide into one of the best friendships that I’ve ever had. She moved to New York that spring and we spent a glorious few months together until I moved back to California – walking and shopping and eating and talking and commiserating and drinking and cementing our friendship. And that brings me back to my main point, which is that we have Facebook (and, I suppose, Prop 8, in a weird way) to thank for all this.

It’s funny, because I believe – unless I am remembering this wrong – Facebook is the way Megan got in touch with Dennis in 2009, years after they interned together in DC, to ask if she could crash on his couch for a couple days – and then she just never left. So they also have Facebook to thank for this entire thing. And we all have Facebook to thank for the incredible wedding and party that they threw.

Megan, I adore you, and I hope you know that. Remember when we met Julia across the hall from us, and we both thought, “Um, it’s not fair that she’s super pretty AND super smart”?  Well, that’s you too – you’re brilliant and beautiful, and I am so happy that we’re friends. I was completely honored to stand next to you at your wedding. Love you!!

Ooh! This happens to be my 250th post ever! A very special post indeed!

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Connecticut & New York City, October 2011

So, Drew and I are back from our East Coast extravaganza. We had a great time, and I’m so happy we went, but I was also totally ready to come home. Which is just about the perfect balance, I guess.

I’m going to start with a Dear Diary overview of the whole thing, then fill in specifics after. I just can’t bring myself to start one, long, DD post of the entire week.

So: last Tuesday night I flew out of SFO on the red-eye to JFK. I got in Wednesday morning, and dropped by my old work to say hi to the people I know who are still working there (there aren’t many left!).

Wednesday afternoon I took a Metro North train to Waterbury, CT, where Megan (the bride), Dawn (the maid of honor) and Toni (the mother of the groom) picked me (the matron of honor) up. We did wedding party things, checked into our hotel, and then Toni and Ken (the father of the groom) took us girls out for dinner.

On Thursday, we had Megan’s bachelorette party in NYC. That deserves, and will get, an entire post.

On Friday, Drew drove up from NYC, where he had arrived late the night before. That afternoon, I had to call in to work for 90 minutes for an interview that I was missing, being out of the office. Friday night – rehearsal and rehearsal dinner.

Saturday was the wedding! Yay for the happy couple!

On Sunday, Drew and I drove back to NYC. We saw an off-Broadway show at Roundabout called Sons of the Prophet, and hung out with Joe and his bf. We had dinner at 5 Napkin Burger, which is always good. We stayed at their Hell’s Kitchen apartment, a luxury and VERY convenient!, and watched Bridesmaids.

On Monday we did some touristy stuff – Wall Street and the protestors, walked along the Hudson, saw the bull at Bowling Green, etc. Then we took our luggage and checked into our Queens hotel, which was in the same neighborhood where we used to live. We had lunch with Jared, our old roommate, and saw our old apartment. That might have been the weirdest part of the whole trip for me. Then in the evening we went to see Sleep No More in the meatpacking district (?).

On Tuesday, we went into Chelsea and I had lunch with Sara, an old coworker who promises me she’s going to come visit San Francisco next summer. I saw the people I didn’t see in the office on my first pass. Then Drew and I did Union Square, The Strand (18 miles of books!), etc, and walked up 5th Avenue. We intended to walk all the way to Central Park (40ish blocks) but couldn’t handle it, so we took the train. We did more 5th Ave, then Rockefeller Center, back through Times Square to the Marquis Theatre to see Follies. Then a late dinner with Kaitlin and Joe on 9th Avenue (at Whym).

Today we checked out of the hotel and took the train to Penn Station, where we got chopped salads for lunch (I miss them so!) and then took the train to JFK, where we were hideously early for our flight. Drew read The Hunger Games, and I called in for a second interview at work. Then a 6 1/2 hour flight and we’re home!

Our apartment is bigger than I remember. And I missed it. It’s really nice to be back.

Okay. I promise to be more interesting in the details. A whirlwind week! But everything went as well as can be hoped, thank God.

I miss things about new York. Other things I don’t miss at all. Bad smells, crazy crowds, the humidity. I definitely am happy that my home is in California. But I hope we can visit NYC again soon!