Category: Self improvement

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Being a girl Books Dreams Fashion Food Friends Love Nonfiction Religion Self improvement Sentiment Writing

21 in 2 months

After yesterday’s post about how I have bought too many books since Jan 1st, a friend asked me to list them all. So here goes!

These are the ones I bought from Amazon with a gift card:

Cell by Stephen King – this is me collecting every Stephen King book
Who the Hell is Pansy O’Hara? by Jenny Bond and Chris Sheedy – I saw this in the used bookstore I used to frequent when I worked at the Opera, and even though Erin said it was so-so, I’ve wanted to read it since then
Magical Thinking by Augusten Burroughs – I want to own all his stuff because I think he’s a good role model for me
Naked, Drunk, and Writing by Adair Lara – I idolize her, and this is one of the best “how to” writing books I’ve ever read
A Wolf at the Table by Augusten Burroughs – collecting all the Augusten Burroughs books is a lot easier than collecting all the Stephen King books

A Game of Thrones by George RR Martin – so good!
Touched by a Vampire by someone named Jones – from the used bookstore, about religion in Twilight…it looks like a joke, and that’s why I bought it, although I paid $7 for it, so who’s the joke on now?
The Complete Sherlock Holmes Volume II by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle – love Sherlock Holmes!
O Pioneers! by Willa Cather – love these Barnes and Noble volumes!
A Widow for One Year by John Irving – love John Irving!
More Tales of the City by Armistead Maupin – I really liked the show at ACT, and I really liked the first Tales of the City, so I look forward to reading more

Oh! Here’s The Complete Sherlock Holmes Volume I, near the foot of the bed. I was reading it about 6 weeks ago.

I shouldn’t count these since they were Christmas presents, but they are sitting out, so…

Etiquette by Emily Post – the 1922 edition!
Running with Scissors by Augusten Burroughs

This was also a Christmas present.

11/22/63 by Stephen King – one of his weirder premises, but I still enjoyed it!

Two major finds a couple weekends ago – two Stephen King books I thought were going to be difficult to get. But they basically fell into my hands!

Blockade Billy by Stephen King – $4.95 on the sale shelf at Barnes and Noble
The Colorado Kid by Stephen King – $2.95 at the used bookstore in Berkeley

Books 2 through 4 of the Underland Chronicles by the author of The Hunger Games. I love these books. I cannot recommend them enough. I also have the first one, but loaned it to Erin. I haven’t bought the fifth and final one yet, but I will when I finish the fourth one.

Gregory the Overlander by Suzanne Collins (not pictured)
Gregory and the Prophecy of Bane by Suzanne Collins
Gregory and the Curse of the Warmbloods by Suzanne Collins
Gregory and the Marks of Secret by Suzanne Collins

Next to the bed! I’m about halfway through and really like it. I think I will read each book before the next season of the HBO series comes out.

A Clash of Kings by George RR Martin

So that’s 19 books that I’ve purchased since January 1st, plus 3 Christmas presents. But wait! I am currently awaiting two books from Amazon:

These are for next month’s book club – they’re both pretty short and we couldn’t meet for another 5 weeks, so we decided to do both of them. I am actually pretty excited about both, but I will probably read them in this order.

The White Castle by Orhan Pamuk
Bright Lights, Big City by Jay McInerney – this book has been on my “to read” list FOREVER

So there you have it. Twenty-one books purchased in the first two months of 2012. Will the trend continue like this?

The thing of it is, I’m obviously not embarrassed or worried about this behavior. I love buying books and having books and reading books. I have no intention to stop buying them. I make no promises like, “I won’t buy anything else until I read everything I own.” There’s a Barenaked Ladies lyric,

I don’t buy everything I read,
I haven’t even read everything I’ve bought.

I identify with that.

Stay tuned, and I’ll give you a full breakdown of all of Stephen King’s works, and the few I still need to complete my collection!

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Awesome Being a girl Dreams Drew Family Love Memoir Self improvement Sentiment

Seven Years

There’s an old wives’ tale that every seven years all the cells in your body have regenerated and replaced themselves, so every seven years you’re like a brand new person.

There’s another saying that relationships suffer from the “seven year itch,” and that you need to be careful at that point because that’s when many people re-evaluate their relationships, and break-ups or divorces happen.

(There’s also research to suggest that the “seven year itch” has become the “three year itch,” and that’s the year you really need to watch out for. Yikes. Three years? Apprently attention spans are shrinking…)

Internet rumors and Yahoo answers aside…this is on my mind because today is Drew’s and my seven year anniversary. It’s hard to believe that it’s only been seven years. I feel like it’s been forever. I couldn’t even buy alcohol when we first got together, and since then we’ve been through college graduations (a certain classmate graduating with each of us, in two different years!), two cross-country moves, pets, no pets, jobs, no jobs, tough times and easier times.

There were times for each of us that we weren’t sure it was going to work out. But that was early days, when we were both still figuring out the intricacies of relationships. By now we’ve learned how to weather storms and that most arguments are momentary and inconsequential. We’ve hit our stride. I could do this forever.

I’m probably not supposed to say this, but I’ve changed a lot in seven years, and it’s due to this relationship. Am I a whole new person? Possibly. Am I better person? Definitely. I’m more patient, quicker to be grateful, and less moody. And if I’m a little cattier…well, it’s all in good spirits. I like me now. I hope other people like me now too.

Happy Anniversary Drew! Here’s to seventy-seven more years! (Hope he reads this post. Otherwise this is kind of awkward.)

Bakers Square, Davis, Jan 2005
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Beginnings Being a girl cars Dreams Drew Exercise Food Home improvements Memoir Self improvement

Setting a routine

We’ve been in our new place for a week now. I can now say comfortably that I do not think we made the worst mistake ever moving out of our apartment. (That was a very real fear a couple times there.)

We’ve now had time to settle in, figure out what stuff goes where, and get used to sleeping in a new bed. We’ve each decided which shower we prefer. We’ve cooked meals in the kitchen. This morning I hosted our book club here and we made lunch for our four-person book club. (It was awesome.) (We should entertain more.)

We lived in the other place for over 2 years. I had a routine down. I knew exactly what I did every morning, and while it was a lot of back and forth from the living room to the bedroom to the bathroom to the bedroom, I knew what each step was and there was a very precise reason I did everything in that order.

But I have to kind of start over here. None of my stuff is in the order it used to be in, for one thing. For another, the bathroom where I shower is not the bathroom where I keep the hair dryer and everything. So there’s a lot more back and forth, because after 4 work days I still haven’t quite figured out what my exact routine is. There’s still a lot of, “What am I missing here?” It takes me a little longer to get out the door in the morning. Which is fine, since my commute is about cut in half.

Drew’s commute is about doubled, which makes our commutes about the same length of time now. Which is nice.

The good thing about getting a chance to recreate your routine, is that it allows you to build in some good stuff. I am trying to build the following things into my routine:

  • Healthier eating, specifically snacking – we’ve purchased a lot of fruit in the last week, and I’m also depending a lot on those frozen vegetables that you steam right in the microwave
  • Cooking dinner – in the last few weeks at the old place, we basically gave up cooking anything besides chicken nuggets on a baking sheet
  • Going to the gym on the way home from work – theoretically I can avoid the worst of rush hour if I wait it out in a spin class
  • More walks – it’s so pretty here, and there are lots of places to explore before hitting the library on the way home.

I also want to try to be more of an adult in 2012: meaning, I want to fold my clothes as soon as they’re clean* and make the bed every day and wash dishes as soon as they’re dirty. Honestly, I have less hope for these resolutions than for the others.

It’s fun to remake yourself every January 1st. And I feel like this year we get an extra boost to help facilitate that!

*I’m rolling my eyes as I write this, since I know that every single clothing item I own is freshly laundered but stuffed into a laundry bag on the floor somewhere. I guess I know what I’m doing tonight.

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Awesome Beginnings Being a girl Dreams Drew Endings Family Memoir Nonfiction Self improvement Sentiment Writing

2011 New Year’s Resolutions: Finis

Now is the time to look back on 2011 and see which of my New Year’s resolutions I accomplished. I’m happy to report that this year went pretty well!

1. Get off of unemployment

In June of 2010 I finished up a contract job at Marin Theatre Company, and I spent the remainder of the year patching together work from MTC, the San Francisco Opera, and reading for Samuel French, as well as supplementing with unemployment. While it wasn’t the tightest things have ever been around here, it was frustrating to be constantly thinking about trying to get enough hours among all the jobs. My number one priority as the year turned from 2010 to 2011 was to get off of unemployment. Which I did, basically right away, when I started subbing in January.

2. Get a career type job

Subbing was very interesting and I learned something, I’m sure. But it was obviously not for me. And like I said before, I was tired of cobbling together a living. My number two priority was to get a freaking real job, with stability and health benefits. Which I did in February! So far, 2011 resolutions are going great!

3. Lose 30 pounds

Oops.

4. Pay off at least one credit card

Oops again. Well, that was a tall order and I might have guessed that it wouldn’t happen.

5. Help Megan to have the best wedding ever

Done and done. I might add, I also helped Liz have the best wedding ever. A good year for weddings!

6. Change everything to my new(ish) last name.

The things I hadn’t yet changed over to my new last name (from my 2009 wedding) were my Mastercard, my gym membership, and three store credit cards. As of this morning I had changed my Mastercard and my gym membership. I planned on just moving this resolution to my “2012 resolutions” list, but then I had this big burst of inspiration, and so I spent some time on the phone this morning calling around and changing the rest of it. 2011 ftw!

I want to mention that every customer service representative I talked to said, “Congratulations on your recent wedding!” when I told them why I needed to change my name. I was too embarrassed to say, “Thanks, it was over 2 years ago.” How time flies.

7. Remember birthday cards for important family members this year

Well, unfortunately I had a couple lapses this year, and for that I am sincerely sorry. I have changed my system because having them in my planner is not working out as well as it used to – I’m just not in the planner often enough. I put the birthdays that keep slipping past me into my gmail calendar so that I’ll get a reminder 2 weeks out, so I can actually get something in the mail in time. 2012 will my card-sending, offending-no-one year.

8. Get a passport!

Thanks to Drew and the scavenger hunt he arranged for my birthday, I am now the proud owner of a passport. And I used it to fly to New York in October, so I know it works.

9. Write!

This was broken down into 5 categories to make it more quantifiable:

  • Script Frenzy in April
  • Submit to Samuel French Off-off-Bway Festival in July
  • Nanowrimo in November (I made the conscious decision to stay sane this November)
  • Blog 100 times over 2011 (the actual number is 168 public posts, counting this one)
  • Look into a Record-Bee column (I actually submitted about four of these)

I’m feeling pretty good about this year! So it’s time to start making me some 2012 resolutions. While I ponder over those and try to make them as specific and achievable as possible…let me know what your biggest resolution is!

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Being a girl Nonfiction Not awesome Self improvement

A Victory in Battle

I can trend towards germophobia. I’m much, much better than I was in New York (“oh no germs everywhere!”) but I still wash my hands a lot and I don’t like touching door handles and I take my shoes off at home and I purell everything after putting gas in the car.

But every so often, a lightbulb comes on over my head and I realize some thing I do every day is probably totally covered in germs.

Communal M&M bowl at work, with everyone’s fingers in it all day? Oops. (But come on…cinnamon M&Ms!)

The lock on a bathroom stall – you wouldn’t believe how long it took me to process that this is not just touched by me when I come in with clean hands…but by everyone leaving the stall, who invariably all have disgusting germy hands!

And my latest one, that I really just realized yesterday: Coke cans.

It looks so smug. But I know the truth now.

That lip you drink from, where drops of soda always collect…I mean, who hasn’t grabbed a can of Coke at a picnic and wiped off that part, because it’s dusty or damp with condensation or it’s just a force of habit? But yesterday I realized – that is a part of the OUTSIDE of the can. That part is exposed to the world, to the factory machines, to grimy people handling it, to dogs…maybe licking it? Maybe? Who knows what’s been happening to it in the time it took for this can to get from the factory to the Jolly King liquor store where I bought it?

 On the other hand, I’m also aware that you need to come in contact with germs on a regular basis in order to keep your immune system healthy.
 
So I drank that entire can. And I loved it. And it made me strong.
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Beginnings Being a girl Books Friends Self improvement

Book Club

I have this kind of bossy friend. And she has taken it upon herself to organize a book club among several people in the Bay Area, who haven’t managed to get it together amongst ourselves. There are five of us – four girls and one guy.

 (I was going to write “women and man,” but that felt really weird, so I changed it back. “Girls and guy” feels okay – although it’s more awkward written out than it would be if I just said it. I always wonder what to say. “Chicks and dude.” “Ladies and gent.” I don’t know.)

Four of us are XX and one is XY. We live all up and down the peninsula. We are all busy enough that we needed this one kind of bossy friend to make us all commit to doing this thing.

The rules are: we trade off choosing books, and you have to choose something that no one has read yet.

Our first book is Divergent by Veronica Roth – a young adult book along the same dystopian themes as Suzanne Collins’ The Hunger Games. (Speaking of The Hunger Games, have you seen the trailer yet?? The movie comes out in March and my coworkers and I can’t wait!) Divergent is about a society in which everyone is divided into factions: Amity (the peaceful), Candor (the honest), Abnegation (the selfless), Erudite (the intelligent), and Dauntless (the brave). You choose your faction when you’re 16 and factions are stronger than blood. If you fall out of a faction (the factionless), you’re essentially homeless and you have very little food and clothing and you have a sucky job.

I do think she is sort of jumping on the Hunger Games bandwagon – but better that than the Twilight bandwagon, amirite?

I haven’t had much time to read yet – but so far I really, really like it. I think it’s going to make for some very interesting conversation when we finally get it together and all five of us sit down and talk about our feelings. I’ve been trying to figure out what faction I would choose, and I currently have no idea. I mean, I’m only 125 pages in (out of almost 500). It makes the main character very sympathetic.

I’m pretty stoked about having a book club. I have been wanting to have one – but not wanting necessarily to join someone else’s and abide by their rules and choices. The kind of bossy leader of our club says that it’s my turn to choose next. I’m debating between Barbara Kingsolver’s Prodigal Summer and Augusten Burroughs’ Possible Side Effects or something completely different.

I’m open to suggestions – although I think Augusten Burroughs would be really fun for everyone. Book club ftw!

(Sorry, you-know-who, I kid. Your bossyness is great! Love you!)

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"Other people" Children Nonfiction Not awesome Self improvement

It’s Either This, or the Plague

You’ve probably heard that Earth recently welcomed its 7 billionth person. Not of all time. But at one time. You’ve also probably heard that in 1950, the world population was about 2.5 billion. That’s a 4.5 billion people growth in 60 years. Perhaps then you’ve also heard that the UN projected world population of 2050 is between 7.5 and 10.5 billion.

Where are these people going to go? I ask myself. Also, Is this going to trigger Nature to do something to help control population growth, a la Stephen King’s The Stand? And finally, How did we let this happen??

Well…I think I know how. In many parts of the world, thanks to society and forward-thinking and liberation, we have very specific views on sex and childbirth. Namely, that both are A-OK no matter what your status in life – age, marital status, finances, etc.

This is where I’m going to tread semi-carefully, because I definitely know people who have gotten pregnant out of wedlock and who have loved and cherished their babies and raised them up (or are in the process of raising them up) to be decent, upstanding, hardworking people.

BUT. The way I understand it – and I wasn’t there; I could be wrong – in the 1950s and before, you just didn’t start having sex with your boyfriend when you were 15 and then accidentally get knocked up before you graduated high school and then keep the baby because you can make your own choices about your own body. But these days…that’s par for the course. Now take that one scenario and multiply it by a billion. Then multiply that again for all those second children that those people just have to have because they love their first one so much. And plus, you know, they already have the first one…

It gets glamorized, being a young mother, on shows like Teen Mom and True Life. Film crews romanticize having a ton of children, on Table for 12, 19 Kids and Counting (don’t get me started on Michelle Duggar being pregnant with #20), Raising Sextuplets, etc. Moms who get artificially knocked up with multiples that come in potentially unsafe droves become celebrities – Kate Gosselin, Nadia Sulemon.

The TV personalities – they aren’t really any of my business. I don’t watch those shows (well…I used to watch Jon & Kate Plus 8 back when it was innovative and sweet) and I ignore the “celebs.” But then I start thinking about them in terms of the population growth, and it just irritates me.

There’s something I like about the idea that each couple on earth gets 2 kids – one to replace each of them. But if one couple is out there having 8, or 12, or 20 kids – well, that’s just greedy.

And the 20-somethings out there, each with their own kid or two, will one day meet and fall in love with someone, who also has his or her own kids. And then they’ll come together and have to have more kids, as proof of their love…or of their total inability to grasp the concept of birth control.

What annoys me is that I want a family someday soon. I don’t want 12 or 15 or 20 kids. I just want one or two. And I resent that here I sit, thinking about the world population and wanting to do my part to reduce growth and help the human race avoid apocalypse – but oops! Here’s one more 19-year-old on Facebook, spilling her guts about accidentally getting pregnant. Or oops! One more 40-something celebrity pretending it’s just an unexpected blessing, when really she went through a bunch of medical treatments, because she just had to have a fourth child.

I think we – as a society – need to get back that some of that healthy shame about sex. It needs to not be totally acceptable for 14-year-olds to be doing it, and maybe some people should get shipped off to visit their spinster aunt to cover up their pregnancy, or something. (Cross my heart, this is hypothetical.)

On the other hand, I’m also advocating for more accessible birth control – possibly just pumped into the water? Because even in my heightened state of anger here (yeah, I think I’ve actually reached the anger stage), I know that I can’t stop a couple billion teenagers from losing themselves in the moment, or however we’re going to justify this. (But seriously, pumping something into the water – that’s not a bad idea.)

I’m not saying this only out of a selfish place. I’m just thinking of the human race and what’s best for us. Surely we don’t want to bring on a plague or an epidemic or something, just because everyone forgot to buy condoms? And also somehow forgot to use a backup method? (Use a backup method, people!)

The way to fix all the world’s problems can be summed up into, “Everyone take some responsibility.” Everyone: just take some freaking responsibility. Lest we reach a point in society where the government just randomly (?) sterilizes a percentage of the population.

Parents – don’t give your 14-year-old the freedom to start having sex.
TLC – stop showing shows that promote getting as much use out of your uterus as you possibly can: just because you have one doesn’t mean it needs to be in constant rotation.
Kids – save yourselves, if not for marriage, at least for love. And if you can’t do that, then get thee to Planned Parenthood.

I’m just trying to ensure space for a couple of my own offspring one day, okay?

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Awesome Memoir Religion Self improvement Sentiment Theatre Writing

How to Write a New Book for the Bible

Yesterday, Drew and I went to see How to Write a New Book for the Bible, by Bill Cain, at Berkeley Rep. I worked with Bill on two shows at Marin Theatre Company – Equivocation and 9 Circles. (Kent Nicholson, who directed How to Write a New Book…, also directed 9 Circles. Kent and Bill are great together – I think that this play wouldn’t have been as good under another director’s hand.) 

Bill was a very active part of both of MTC’s rehearsal processes, and consequently we spent a lot of time together. He is a very sweet and very quirky guy, and was always willing to talk to me about whatever – writing, theatre, etc – and after one conversation about self-editing, he showed me a draft copy of How to Write a New Book…, and the ridiculous amounts of notes he scribbles on every single page. I really liked working with him.

I don’t know what I was expecting from How to Write a New Book…, really – I knew the show was about the death of his mother and that it was highly autobiographical. Bill is a Jesuit priest, and religion is always a main character in his shows.

I’ve never seen a show at Berkeley Rep before. First of all, I loved the theatre – it was their thrust stage, which is a really interesting space. At about 5 minutes til curtain, the house manager (?) came in and announced the whole space, “Feel free to scoot inwards for a better seat,” and then Drew and I watched a bunch more people come in, and we decided that that announcement was the worst idea ever.

As for the show itself…it was about the death of his mother, and it was highly autobiographical. It created a lot of feelings in me. Feelings about writing, about religion, about family, about theatre, about God, about life, about being in rehearsal with Bill and hearing pieces of these anecdotes. I sort of loved the use of the small set, and the staging. The actors (2 playing themselves through the whole thing, and 2 playing multiple characters) were stellar.

There was a Bible passage that was repeated several times throughout the play – I’m not sure of the speaker or the location. But I believe it’s Peter or Paul, and it’s along the lines that “All things come together for the greater good.” (Uncle Pastor, help with this? Book of Acts, maybe?) In the play, Bill (the character – but also sort of the writer) repudiates this. I personally tend to think that all things do work together and work out – but I know that Bill would argue with me on that, and have lots of good examples and probably Bible verses to back it up. So I probably wouldn’t start that argument.

How to Write a New Book for the Bible is only playing through Nov 20th. I fully recommend it to anyone who can go in the next week.

We’ve seen a lot of theatre over the last 6 weeks. I probably walked out of this one with the most residual feelings at the end. Highest commendation?

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Awesome Beauty Beginnings Being a girl Endings Fashion Food Friends Love Memoir Self improvement Sentiment Work

Megan’s Bachelorette!

Megan wanted to go into New York City for her bachelorette party. So 2 days before the wedding, 9 girls piled into a limo and prepared to take the Big Apple.

2 Ms of Honor, 5 bridesmaids, 1 friend, and 1 bride!

It was about a two hour drive into the city, with one stop for orange juice (to mix with the champagne we’d brought) and another bathroom/snack stop (the first of many of the day).

The limo dropped us at Astor Place, where everyone grabbed some pizza to get us through until dinnertime. Then we walked down to our East Village nail salon, called Blush – a place I would highly recommend (I really need to write them a Yelp review).

I love this picture!

I originally wanted a French manicure, but ended up just getting a regular one with a super pearly pale white color. I really liked it – and the whole thing was worth it for the cuticle cleaning up and the hangnail clipping. Man, I love that.

A success!

After our salon time, we walked back to Astor Place to catch an N train to Times Square. A couple of the girls had never seen New York City, so we checked out Times Square, including the M&M store and the Hershey store.

Then we walked over a block to Megan’s favorite New York restaurant, La Masseria.

After that we wandered through Times Square, and down to 42nd Street. We went into Dave & Busters to find a bathroom, then we heard from the limo driver that he was trying to get back into the city but was stuck in traffic. So we decided to walk back up to Toys ‘R’ Us to ride on the ferris wheel. But we all got separated, so 6 of them went on the ferris wheel and 3 of us ended up watching.

Then, Megan realized she was missing her phone, so her cousin Emily called it about 20 times until someone answered. Turned out it was back at Dave & Busters. Then the limo driver called and was going to meet us at 42nd and Broadway. So I grabbed Megan and said, Let’s run back to Dave & Busters, the two of us can go really quickly. So we dashed back and got her phone, then back to the limo.

He drove us downtown past the Freedom Tower (I’m still not totally sure why) and then back to Connecticut. We got back to Mindi’s house and drank and talked and ate Cheez-its and played with her kitten. Then around 1:30 we divvied up the sleeping places (I got the couch!) and passed out.

The next morning it was back to the hotel via Dunkin Donuts breakfast, and then lots more to do before the rehearsal dinner Friday night!

A muy successful bachelorette party: a great salon, a great dinner, NYC fun, and Megan even got her lost phone back!

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Nonfiction Self improvement

Dilation, then candy

Eye doctor appointment this morning. I still call it that, “eye doctor,” even though it makes me sound like a 5-year-old. Eyes are fine, although left is slightly more near-sighted, while right remains the same. I like having vision insurance. It’s going to get me a new pair of glasses – the pair I have now is literally from high school, and one of the lenses has a crack running almost all the way through it. Yikes! I also have vision insurance through Drew, so his insurance will buy me new contact lenses. That’s how I roll!

They dilated my eyes. It’s kind of awful. Then the doctor is all up in them, looking with lights and penlights and vertical lights, and I’m embarrassed because I can’t keep my eyes from blinking. Then I had to drive to work. I didn’t have any problems with focusing, but because of the dilation, the world was OMG SO BRIGHT, and so I had to drive with 2 pairs of sunglasses on. I knew there was a reason I had three pairs of sunglasses in the car. (The third was backup.)

I feel like such a grown-up. So responsible.

Until I took one of the Jolly Ranchers on the receptionist’s counter. But who can resist Jolly Ranchers?