Categories
"Other people" Being a girl Endings Self improvement Sentiment Theatre

Working hard, or hardly working

You know what’s underrated? The old-fashioned business letter.

I remember learning the format for these things in keyboarding class in high school. I sort of loved making my own letterhead (mine always had a strong Phantom of the Opera theme) and typing up important letters to important people.

We don’t really get to do that very much anymore.

I mean, even though I try to keep my emails nice and professional, I still get tons of work emails from people, using little punctuation or capitalization, and ending with that ubiquitous “Sent from my iPhone.” Like that’s supposed to excuse this mediocre attempt at communication:

“i see no thank you i do not have transportation but im sure other students will jump on this offer”

Also embarrassing is the email signature incorporating some song lyric or “Chinese proverb” that’s not really a Chinese proverb at all.

I got an email from someone the other day – it ended like so:

I’ve heard it said that people come into our
lives for a reason, bringing something we must
learn, and we are led to those who help us most
to grow, (if we let them) and we help them in return.

Also? No credit on that. So…plagiarism? (To avoid plagiarism myself, that’s from Wicked.)

Meanwhile, I gleefully typed this up this morning:

Not saying it’s perfect, but at least it’s not embarrassing. Simple pleasures…but pleasures nonetheless!

Categories
Nonfiction Self improvement

They do it with mirrors

*Spoiler alert* Dental hygienists are not wizards.

A week ago I made a dentist appointment. Not because anything was wrong, but because it had been 6 months since my last appointment, and I got one of those little postcards in the mail.

Um, thanks.

So my appointment was on Tuesday, and on Monday night I sat around thinking, “Why am I going to this thing again? I was JUST THERE.”

But adulthood is adulthood, and I mean, I went to the dentist twice a year for the first 20 years of my life, so it’s not unfamiliar territory. But it’s amazing how fast you get used to infrequent health care when you go without insurance for a few years.

But that’s all in the past now. Now I’m an adult who goes to the dentist every six months. So I went.

Near the end of my cleaning, the hygienist pointed out the top outside gums on the right side of my mouth, and said, “Your gums look a little tender here. This is where you start when you brush your teeth, isn’t it?”

And I thought for a second and said, “Wow, yeah, it is.”

And she said, “Try starting somewhere else in your mouth, because you start out brushing rougher, and by the time you get to that part of your mouth it’ll be a little softer.”

And I thought, “OMG, she’s like a wizard or something!!”

I’ve brushed my teeth 3 times since then, and I am forced to admit – I don’t naturally start brushing there at all. I start on the complete opposite side. I have no idea what the reason for weird tender gums is. Maybe I’m just extra aggressive there. I don’t know. But she’s not a wizard at all.

Illusion shattered!

Categories
Awesome Being a girl Exercise Nonfiction Self improvement

Tips For The First Spin Class

Yesterday I finally attended my first spin class. This is what I said to my co-workers as I was leaving work to head to the gym:

“It sounds fun! I mean it can’t be that hard, right?”

At least I sort of knew at the time I was going to have to eat those words later – but I did think, how hard can biking be? It’s just biking. It’s not like I have to jump around waving weights around my head. It’s just legs.

Well, I was wrong. It’s not just legs. And it is hard.

Here are some hints, if you’re thinking of attempting this for the first time:

1. The seat is not comfortable. This is probably because you’re supposed to be up off of it for most of the class. If, like me, you sat out some of the standing-up sections, be prepared for a slightly sore behind the next day. (I ended up wadding up my towel and awkwardly stuffing it underneath myself at one point. It helped, moderately.)

2. When you sit on the bike for the first time, and it spins really easily, and you’re like, “This is awesome”? Look down. That little knob puts more tension on. You’ll spend most of the class with it tightened. Get ready. Enjoy the no-tension while you can.

3. An hour of watching Law & Order flies by. An hour of spin, not so much. At some point (for me it was 10 minutes in), you’ll start to think the clock might be broken. It’s not.

4. Related to #3, the first half hour is a lot slower than the second half hour. Stick it out.

5. When your badass intructor says, “Remember, everyone can go at their own pace at any time,” he may be talking to you. You’re allowed to ease off on the tension if you’re dying, and as long as you’re still pushing yourself, you’re still good.

6. It seems to me that this is the kind of thing where you show fast improvement, especially at the beginning. I found the standing up portions difficult in the first half hour, but much easier in the second half hour. I’m excited for my next class, to see how much easier the entire thing will be. (#WishfulThinking?)

7. If you find yourself plotting ways to get out of the room before the hour is up (my best plan was to fake losing a contact, then scoop up my keys and bolt for the door), just stare at the tramp stamp on the girl in front of you and keep going. You can do it!

Categories
Exercise Friends Self improvement

Be as much of all that you can be

I am always the most motivated late at night. When I’m lying there waiting to fall asleep (which could take anywhere from 15 minutes to an hour and a half), that’s when I think of all the things I am sure to accomplish. That’s where the Atkins idea was born (after many, many failed plans). That’s when I’m sure I’m going to get up early and hit the gym. That’s when I psych myself into thinking I can totally wear heels to work.

But the next morning is when I remember that Atkins sucks, I’m so tired and this bed is so warm and the gym is so far away through the fog, and who am I kidding? I totally have no skills for wearing heels, and I’ll probably fall down the stairs and that will be hella embarrassing.

Last week I made the late night decision to sign back up for Weight Watchers. I also made a late night decision to change my gym membership so I can go to any 24 Hour Fitness (for the last year I’ve just had access to one club).

So that’s my new plan. So far it’s going pretty well. Plus, I have the iPhone now so I can use the WW mobile app, which is helpful, I guess? Also the 24 HF app. I like the way those apps look sitting next to each other.

Tomorrow my friend Sam and I are going to a gym that’s near my work and her house. We’re going to try some class that I’ve never tried before. It’s sort of making me nervous. But I think it’ll be easier to go after work, and especially with a friend. And their class schedule is so much better than my home gym’s schedule! – now maybe I’ll be able to make it to a spin class, which I have still not accomplished.

Anyway, wish me luck. I have one wedding in 2 months, and then another one in 3 months, so my plan is to look awesome for both of them. Now that I’ve lined up the tools – I just have implement them.

Categories
Beginnings Nonfiction Self improvement Work

Just Me & My Fear Of Heights

Yesterday afternoon I went with a couple co-workers to hang twinkle lights in the trees outside the theatre we perform in. Our New Works Festival is coming up in a week or so (eek) and twinkle lights are kind of a tradition. Anyway, hanging lights in the trees required ladders.

I kind of have a ladder phobia. These were relatively small ladders, and I was going up only a couple steps, so it was okay. But in general, I do not like ladders.

Ladders can fall over. Ladders could slip on the ground and slide out from under you. Ladders can be placed unsteadily on grass and tip you off.

Being a stage manager, I’ve been in contact with a lot of ladders. Usually I don’t have to be the one climbing them though – luckily that is normally someone else’s job – like the lighting people. God bless you, lighting people, and your CRAZY LONG ladders that you balance on unsteady rails in the air, and then scale like you have no fear. God bless you also with your scaffolding that you build as you climb it (I’m looking at you, Marin), and your genies. Ugh.

In New York I worked on a show where, to get to the booth, I had to climb a ladder affixed to the wall. I spent the entire 4-week run convinced I was going to slip one day and fall and die. Then someone told me that it wasn’t that high, and I probably wouldn’t die, which alleviated some of my stress. But I’m still grateful that I will never, ever have to set foot in that theatre again – it was one of the three worst spaces I’ve ever worked in.

I don’t mind being up in the air – as long as I’m on something sturdy, permanent, and preferably not see-through. I would definitely like to try out that glass walkway thing that goes out over the Grand Canyon, but I’m pretty sure it would scare the bejeezus out of me. But you know, in a fun way.

Maybe this fear came from my family’s infamous tree house story – my dad is probably rolling his eyes at the fact that I am bringing this up – but when my brother and I were kids, we were building this AWESOME tree house out in our back-backyard. For a little while, it was just a platform in the tree, and Robb and I used to climb up the ladder (see? no fear then) and spy on the neighbors while they lounged in their random hot tub. One day, as my dad, Robb and I were up there working on adding walls or something, the whole thing collapsed and dumped us out of the tree. We were all totally fine, and although we talked about rebuilding it, we never actually got around to it.

Possibly that’s when I started being wary of heights and ladders and genies and other things like that.

Anyway, I made it through yesterday afternoon: 
working with the scary, scary 6′-ladder and the towering, monstrous pretty purple trees, and the muy peligroso twinkle lights. I stayed off the ladder as much as possible and just climbed around on the benches under the trees. No biggie.

And hopefully now the courtyard will be gorgeous and lure in many, many ticket buyers. I guess it’s all in a day’s work.

If you feel like commenting, tell me the ridiculous thing you’re afraid of! Backstory speculation is welcome, but not necessary.

Categories
"Other people" Exercise Self improvement

Day 3: My Dirty Little Secret

Okay, so it’s not really dirty and it’s hardly a secret.

I don’t really like going to the gym.

I like saying I go to the gym, I like the way I feel afterwards, and I like the idea of being someone who works out. But I don’t love doing it. I don’t spring out of bed to go for a run, and you will certainly never find me at a 5:30 am spin class. I think that I would prefer going in the afternoon, when I’m not dragging myself from bed…but then the weekend rolls around and manage to find other ways to fill my time. Since I joined this gym a year ago, I haven’t been transformed into a hard-bodied supermodel. (Not saying I’m not healthier but that’s a different story.)

This morning, since I had the chance to come into work a little later than usual, I dragged myself to the gym. Haven’t been there in almost a week. I couldn’t face getting on the treadmill so I focused on strength exercises, which are still good but don’t require quite as much psyching-up.

These people did get on the treadmill this morning – and I admire them. (In the foreground is one of my favorite strength machines – I think the exercise is a chest press? I do like that.)

Good for you, runners (and walkers). Hopefully tomorrow I’ll be up there with you.

Categories
Being a girl Not awesome Self improvement Work

Menlo Park, 94025

Day 2 of my Realistically Regular Life: lunch.

My work friend Jonathan dubbed this my "sad-wich."

Trying to find the balance between “no money to spend on food” and “trying to eat healthy” is hard. Sure, I’d love to have piles of money to spend on fresh fruit and tubs of greek yogurt. The reality is that I have to figure out what’s already in the kitchen and how to put it together in the best combinations, to cut back on those daily trips to Safeway.

Some people can make eating on a budget sound glamorous and fun – I’m looking at you, Rachael Ray, traveling Europe and spending the equivalent of a tank of gas every single day and calling it a show. But really? It’s just another morning making another (lean) turkey and (2%) cheese sandwich with (zero WW-points) mustard.

Categories
Being a girl Friends Memoir Self improvement Work

My life, realistically

This weekend I visited Davis, along with 2 of my girlfriends from college, and amidst the hours of nonstop talking (we had a lot to catch up on) I admitted having feelings of jealousy as of late. They reacted as I expected: much “Are you crazy??” and trying to explain to me why I was being irrational, but you know, sometimes jealousy isn’t rational.

We eventually decided the problem is Facebook – isn’t it always? – and then hatched a plan for a 14-day photo project.

The theory behind this is that people post all kinds of pictures of their awesome vacations, and their awesome dinners, and their awesome new outfits, and their awesome houses, and their awesome everything. And then you get jealous of them. But of course they’re not posting pictures of their dirty laundry pile, or the traffic they commute through, or the fact that for dinner they just made Hamburger Helper but they didn’t actually have hamburger so they used hot dogs and it was kind of gross.

So for the next 2 weeks I’m going to post realistic pictures of my every day life. Sounds like fun, right? Well, you’re welcome.

Day 1 – Here’s my getting-full recycling box at work, which I then had to take downstairs to the big recycling dumpster. Three cheers for mundane tasks that need to get done!

I just love recycling.
Categories
Beauty Being a girl Fashion Self improvement Sentiment

Pincurls: good for getting hair to fit under a wig; not good for much else.

I am the perfect target audience for marketers. The kind of person who sees a pizza commercial and thinks, Let’s have that tonight. One strong memory I have from New York is of watching Kung-Fu Panda on DVD with Drew one night, and during one scene where they’re all eating noodles, we paused the movie and went to Duane Reade to get Cup Noodles because they just sounded so good.

I know, right?

(Side note: Is it just called “Cup Noodles”? I feel like when I say it out loud, it’s like “Cup-a-noodles” but this was what they had on the official Nissin website, so…)

So what’s a girl to do with 8 hours of free time, no chaperone, and a book called Kabul Beauty School? She gets an idea to have her own little beauty school. And with still-damp hair from the shower, and a two-thirds-full card of bobby pins, nothing sounds better than putting her hair in pincurls.

I finished Kabul Beauty School, Drew said he was swinging by the apartment to pick something up, and suddenly I felt kind of stupid. So I unwrapped all the curls and was left with a head full of very crimpy, still slightly damp, hair. After I brushed it out it became very crimpy and now fluffy, too.

This is my friend Kirsten’s dog. He’s a schnoodle named Attila. We now look somewhat alike.

In fact, I remember having this same revelation years ago in college, when Kirsten spent like two hours braiding my hair into tiny braids, while I chatted on AIM with some guy. The reveal at the end of that escapade – which, I’m sorry to say, lasted a couple days as I left the braids in for maximum style – was much the same at this, and our third roommate, Hailey, dubbed me “Weird Feet Poodle Head.”

(The “weird feet” part came from a whole separate story, involving the interesting patterns in which I wore out my flip-flops.)

I guess what I’m trying to say is, it’s true that if you don’t learn from your mistakes you’re doomed to repeat them. And yes, I fully believe that in a few years I’ll be watching some movie or reading some book, and have some free time, and go, Hey, pincurls are easy and might be interesting!

Categories
Awesome Being a girl Fashion Self improvement

Everything you ever wanted to know about organizing a picnic

Probably most people have heard of Emily Post and her famous etiquette books…but have you ever cracked one open? Those babies are chock-full of gold, as I discovered when I snagged the eleventh revised edition at an estate sale last year.

Now it sits on the shelf and every so often Drew will read me a couple sections, which offer advice tell you exactly how to handle every situation from Introductions, Greetings, and Farewells (Part One, Chapter 1) to An Invitation to the White House (Part Eleven, Chapter 59), and it doesn’t stop there.

This edition, revised by Elizabeth Post (granddaughter by marriage of Emily Post), was published in 1965 and is 678 pages long, not counting the preface(s) and index.

I’m just going to crack it open and read you some paragraphs. I am not searching out specific passages.

Motels and hotels

To Assure Accommodations in Hotels:
It is well to write or telegraph in advance for accommodations in a hotel. A typical telegram reads:

PLEASE RESERVE DOUBLE ROOM WITH BATH FOR WIFE AND SELF AFTERNOON DECEMBER THIRD TO FIFTH.
JOHN G. HAWKINS

A letter is a little more explicit:

Manager of the Lake Hotel,
Chicago, Illinois
Dear Sir:
     Please reserve two single rooms with baths or with a bath between for my daughter and me. We are due to arrive in Chicago at five o’clock on the afternoon of December sixth and shall stay a week.
     I prefer moderate-priced rooms not higher than the fourth floor.
Very truly yours,
Mrs. George K. Smith

(Note that this is one of the few occasions when “Mrs.” belongs with a woman’s signature.)

Tea Dances

An afternoon tea dance often takes the place of the old-fashioned debutante ball. <<See Chapter 27, “Balls and dances.”>> It may equally well be given to introduce a new daughter-in-law. On occasion, it may be your responsibility to see that someone who has moved to your community is properly introduced, and a tea dance serves this purpose very well.

Invitations, especially to a dance given to introduce the bride of a son, are usually written on the visiting card of the hostess with “To meet Mrs. Grantham Jones, Jr.” across the top. it is equally correct, however, to use the inside of a fold-over card or an informal. They may also be telephoned.

The arrangements for a tea with dancing are much the same as for an evening dance. A screen of greens in front of which the musicians sit, perhaps a few green vines here and there, and flowers on the tables form the typical decorations. Whether in a hotel, club ballroom, or a private drawing room, the curtains are drawn, and the lights lighted as though for a dance in the evening. Usually only tea, chocolate, breads, and cakes are served.

Picnics: A Check List

The perfect picnic manager, like the perfect traveler, has made simplification an exact science. She knows very well that the one thing to do is to take the fewest things possible and to consider the utility of those few.

Fitted hampers, tents and umbrellas, folding chairs and tables are all very well in a shop – and all right if you have a trailer or a station wagon for hauling them. But the usual flaw in picnics is that there are too many things to carry and look after and too much to clean and pack up and take home again.

Therefore, for those who organize picnics frequently, it is a good idea to make up a list of all items that may be needed and check it each time before leaving. All the equipment may not be necessary for every picnic, but a list will prevent the salt or the bottle opener from being omitted!

===

I don’t want to overwhelm anyone, but please, if you have any questions about how to handle anything (new baby, second wedding, audience with the Pope, anything), then just let me know and I’d be happy to see what Emily and Elizabeth Post have to say about it. I guarantee it’ll be interesting and give you a new perspective on it, even if you don’t necessarily take their advice.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go sit in my pajamas and eat crackers and Babybel while reading a paperback.